Sad :(

So um... this is a bit more embarrassing for me than usual and I'm gonna explain why. What I'm gonna share now is a text, rather short, still a text. My english is not perfect and therefore, it's embarrassing for me to share... It's also something I've had on my mind for years. Since 2009. But I was always too shy to do it because I was afraid people would think I love the drama (which... is a bit true, yes, I like writing drama xD what can I say) because I- uh, Drew is dead in this story. And she isn't dead because it's dramatic and cool, she is because of story purpose and because it ... just explains a lot.

Now if you've seen my previous post you know the context of 2009!Dean visiting a post apocalyptic possible future. So here we go...

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When Dean had asked earlier about both Sam and Drew, his future-self had eluded the question. In other words, lied. He thought both of them had died in Detroit, turns out Sam didn’t. But what about Drew ? Was she alive ? Was she somewhere ? If she died, Dean needed to know how, when, why. Enough to make sure once he got back to his time, this wouldn’t happen.

Dean knew future-Dean wasn’t gonna be helpful, worse than that, he wasn’t to be trusted fully. He wasn’t gonna judge the guy though. He understood why he became like that. Losing everyone and then fighting so long for nothing, that’s gotta change a man. Still, Dean had to know what happened to his little sister. He caught Chuck while he was running outside carrying a pile of paper. Chuck was the perfect person to ask, he’d know.

“Hey. Hey Chuck. Can I ask you something ?”

Nervous, Chuck nodded “Uh, yes of course. What is it ?”

“Where’s Drew ?”

Chuck stared at him, silent. Then he started stuttering “Ah, uh. Well. Uh, I… You…” until he took a deep breath. “Look. Ask Cass.”

Dean raised his brows “Why ?”

Of all people, why him.

“Just… just do that.” and Chuck left, quick steps putting as much distance between him and Dean as he desired.

Dean watched as the “prophet” left, now more curious than he’s been before. He found Castiel sitting in front of his cabin. He smiled when Dean arrived, said “Hey !” and then “Hi !”

“Hey.” Dean replied, though he couldn’t help but find this weird. “There’s something I need to know. Chuck sent me, told me you’d know, so... Where’s my sister ?”

The wide smile on Castiel’s face faded away. Dean noticed. All of this started to upset him, he needed an answer, now.

“Where’s Drew ?” Dean insisted.

“She’s dead.” he said, harshly. “Drew’s dead, okay ?”

Dean breathed in, then out. He had guessed, honestly. Otherwise, why wouldn’t she be here.

“How ?” he asked.

“She went for Sam. Found Lucifer instead.”

“He killed her ?”

“I couldn’t do anything.”

“You were there ? With her ?”

“Yes. But useless.” he swallowed “Weak and useless. I couldn’t protect her, I couldn’t stop it, no matter how hard I tried.” he shook his head.

Dean glanced at him and the change in his attitude and frowned. He stood there quiet for a few seconds, the time for him to process what he had just learned.

“It wasn’t your fault.” he finally said. “You tried-”

“You don’t get it. That morning she smiled at me, she was hopeful, I can still hear it - her voice. But before noon, she was gone. She left nothing, none of that hope behind her.”

Dean raised a brow as something just popped in his mind.

“I get the feeling there’s something I don’t know.” he said.

Castiel stared at him in the eyes for a few seconds.

“Well ?”

“We were together.” he replied. “Drew and I.”

“Together ?”

“Yes, together.” he repeated, with more strength in his voice.

“What ? You - and my little sister ?”
Hints of anger rose in the big brother’s voice, and in spite of the situation, Castiel chuckled at the reaction, then he rested his painful forehead on his hand and groaned.

“Yeah.” he sighed “We’ve been together for years. Man. That was… good.” he smiled again as memories came back to him. “We were great. She knew just how to make me feel strong despite everything. And how to make me happy.” he bit his lip “Sometimes she’d-”

Dean shook his hand “Cass. Stop. I don’t need details.”

“I loved her, your sister.” he said “Still do.”

“So that’s it ? The reason why you’re… that ?” he said, waving his hand in circle in front of him.

Castiel shrugged. “Look I just… I don’t care anymore.”

“We’ll see about that. I’m not letting my sister die. Not if I can stop it.”